meet the crazies

Here we go again… the moment we’ve all been waiting for is finally here. The greatest journey of Sean Lowe’s life has begun! It’s sure to be amazing. And dramatic. Holy Toledo. Makes me want to put in a weave and sing a country song. Or do a backflip in a sequin gown and fall on my face.

But for now I’ll settle for dedicating my Monday nights to watching yet another season of The Bach that’s sure to involve tears, thorn-less roses, bikinis, stretchers, endless corniness, drunken girls, bitch fights and hopefully one diamond ring and a guest appearance from Neil Lane.

I seriously love the first episode of the season. Watching the girls come out of the limo trying to force love at first sight never gets old. My favorite awkward moments:

Lindsay in a wedding dress: "I’ve got balls." Sean: "I sure hope not! Kiss MEEEEE"

Poor, poor Robyn falling on her face while trying to do some sort of gymnastics move.

BLUE 32!! BLUE 32!! BLUE 32!!! Should I say it again?

Sean’s look of terror when 50 Shades of Drunk pulled out a tie and hinted that she wants to be tied up (or whipped?). Thank God Sean brought his rape whistle. That girl is a drunken mess.

Monica Potter, I mean Taryn, crying because she “doesn’t fight over guys,” yet decided to come on The Bach. Has she NEVER seen an episode? It’s kinda what you signed up for.

Paige, just give up. The Bach is not for you. Stick to Jumbotrons.

Hi Ken, I’m "Baaahbee"

Was happy to see Kacie B and her amazing legs back in action, but I'm not sure she's gonna go far. And I was kinda bummed 50 Shades of Cray didn't get a rose... I quite enjoyed her booty shake and S&M obsession. Oh well, at least Lindsay and Tierra seem to have a little cray in them to tide us over.

Cheers to new beginnings and a crazy journey! Probably the craziest one of all time.